If I was to invent a tracking device, I'd make sure I wouldn't put a very noticeable large blinking light on it.

Demetri Martin with Levi MacDougall, January 13th 2012

First row, perfectly centered.

Demetri Martin, being hilarious. (@DemetriMartin)

http://demetrimartin.com/

Funny guy Levi MacDougall (@levimacdougall) doing the beer unicorn.

http://www.levimacdougall.com/

Every time we have cake at work for a special occasion, it always looks a lot better than it tastes.

I realized today that there are three things that instantly make me mad. I wish it was world hunger or political corruptions or little puppies getting strangled but alas, it's nothing that serious.

Here they are, in no particular order:

1) The Star Wars prequels. I looked forward to The Phantom Menace like I've never looked forward to anything before. I watched the sneak peak and the trailer about a million times. I stood in line at 6am for 8 hours for presale tickets, and then another 8 hours before the show. But then, the movie sucked. I was crushed.

2) The ending of LOST. I somehow knew it was going to be a disaster but I kept hoping. It sucked, bad. I realize that the pressure was on for this to end well, and I couldn't figure out how'd they end it properly. Evidently neither did the people who wrote for the show.

3) Patrick Roy getting traded from the Montreal Canadiens. I was a huge Habs fan (I still am, but not as passionately) and Patrick Roy was my favourite player. Then the Habs traded him in what is considered to be one of the worst trades ever. I couldn't believe it. I actually stopped watching hockey from about 1995 to 2004.


Years later, these things still piss me off to no extent.

Toronto Rock vs Calgary Roughnecks

Raising the banner for the Toronto Rock's 6th Championship! 

... Unfortunately the Rock lost the game 12-9 against the Calgary Roughnecks.

I know Twitter isn't a big deal, and getting tweets from "celebrities" isn't a huge deal either but on the other hand I just think it's kind of cool because you get to interact with people you pretty much would never have a chance to otherwise.

This guy, Michael Santini played for the Brampton Battalion (OHL Team) and I always used to shout out his name like a Jawa in Star Wars (they yell out "Utini!"). I thought I'd share it with him and he retweeted it and now I have a warm fuzzy feeling inside.

The whole New Year's Eve thing is dumb.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-your-new-years-resolutions-going-to-fail/ - Check out this awesome article on Cracked. I love Cracked.com.

So no, that picture of you that one time all dolled up as a bridesmaid is not proper representation of what you typically look like.

Check out this dude's column on IGN.com, super interesting stuff on comic books.

Roger Lajoie from FAN590 responding to me because I am so cool.

Comedian Mark Forward and I sharing a Twitter moment.

Awww.

Me: "Can I go home?"
Coworker: "No."
Me: "Everything you say today, I'm going to take as the exact opposite. So 'no' means 'yes'."
Coworker: "It's not opposite day today, Dan."
Me: "You just proved my point."

Yeah, mind blown by my superior mental skills.

Jon Lajoie (with special guest Mark Forward), November 12th 2011

Jon Lajoie (www.jonlajoie.com)

Opening act:

Mark Forward (www.markforward.com)

Great, hilarious show!

Ugh, some people need to stop breathing so hard into the phone when they call me... It's like some nightmare gross phone sex I can't wake up from.

Jeff Blair is a radio announcer (among other things) on Sportsnet Radio 590 The FAN here in Toronto.

A coworker broke her hand and this conversation could be overheard at work today.

Coworker: "Ugh, it's so hard."
Me: "What, life?"
Coworker: "No, typing with one hand. You try doing it for like, 30 mins."
Me: "Trust me, most guys have no problems typing with one hand."

*groans from the office*

If I type in a font name that I don't have on my computer, it tells me it isn't available but still asks me if I want to use it anyways... What's it going to do, kind of guess on how it should look like?

Let's try it.

Oh look, Windows chose something that looks suspiciously as 'Times New Roman' as the font style for my self created "vag" font.

Louis CK, October 15th 2011

Comedian Louis CK at the Sony Centre For The Performing Arts in Toronto, ON

Yeah that's right, direct message from George Takei himself to yours truly.